Daniel left early this morning in a Budget truck headed for Memphis. Right now our room consists of an air mattress and suitcase. The shower is lined with travel sized toiletries. The freezer is packed with frozen meals. And I have a daughter in my arms who depends on me to keep it together.
Over the years of infertility, I heard many cruel and stupid comments from people. One being - that maybe this was the Lords way of telling me that I shouldn't be a mother. That He knew I wouldn't be a good mother.
As we loaded up the truck yesterday, those thoughts came back to me. I was going to be left for 10 days to take care of Lyla by myself. What if I couldn't do it? What if I completely fall apart? It's only been a few hours since he left, and I already feel lost. I should have known I'd have to deal with my insecurities at some point. Just didn't think it would be so soon!
Lyla sleeping on her cradle mattress next to my air mattress. Did someone say slumber party?
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